Snow=Crazy

Last night, against my better judgment, I was convinced to brave the devilish weather for the almighty party. Overall, I'm glad I did it, but the evening had enough questionable experiences to make me question my own sanity. It seems that in D.C., when it snows all of the crazies come out.

I ride the Metro so frequently that it has become a verb for me rather than I noun. I often find myself saying, "yeah, I'm going to metro down to Dupont Circle for dinner." Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that I have never really had a bad experience on the Metro. People complain about the red line being inconvenient and problematic, but I have never had a REALLY bad ride. Until last night, that is. When I got on the train in Bethesda, I questioned the intelligence of getting on the first car knowing that that was the one that got mangled when the two trains collided a few months ago. Well, the trains didn't crash, but some guy in my car did. He was high as high can be with pinky nails about an inch long. Underneath his skull cap he had massive headphones which were blaring techno music to which he was dancing all around the train until he thought it was a better idea to run from one end to the other while the train was in motion. How he avoided those metal poles with his cap pulled down over his mostly shut eyes is beyond me. What he couldn't avoid, though, were the multitude of laps that he was thrown into during his spastic dancing.

I think everyone was getting a little uncomfortable because we were all looking around wondering who was going to be the one to hold the guy down if things got out of hand. Well, thank God for Metro. They have police officers at the stops. Luckily, one got on our car to keep an eye on our coked out friend. Unluckily, she was a sixty-ish woman who did not even approach the man. She just watched, you know, to make sure things didn't get out of hand. I'll be honest, she didn't offer me peace of mind.

Then as I waited for my friend on the platform, I was hit up by a homeless woman who wanted money to feed the twins that she didn't have with her. In trying to get away from her, I ended up next to a woman who was dressed like she was really rich, but her behavior suggested that she was attempting to pick my pockets. She sidled up to me with weird conversation and as I made attempts to regain my personal space, she kept stepping right back into it. Luckily, I made it home with all of my money. I'm not sure if I look especially friendly or weak or naive or what, but these women insisted on talking to me like I was their best friend. This has never happened to me on the Metro before either.

And, finally, this one's not crazy, but is disgusting. As I was waiting for my train to take me home, the girl standing next to me leans over the railing and pukes up her dinner and the time and money that she spent at the bar. Luckily, her boyfriend was there to hold her hair back so I felt no responsibility to take care of her. I moved to the other side of the platform. I hope that doesn't make me a bad person.

By the end of the night I was walking home at 2:30 in the morning, 22 degrees, and the winds were blowing snow in my face at 15 mph. Take it from me. If you go out on a night like last night, you're bound to run into some crazies and you're a little crazy yourself. But, at least you'll get some good stories out of it.